I was banned from posting on RSD Nation last weekend.
I'm noticing a lot of mixed feelings about this and wanted to share them here, with the intention of (hopefully) getting people in the seduction community talking.
My first response, and it's still with me, was some sadness. Initially sadness that no one talked to me before banning me, they just did it.
Perhaps they viewed it as a business decision, but from my perspective it's more than that. This is a community that I've been participating in for a year now, and it felt like a community to me. It's vibrant. I enjoy it. So to be unceremoniously banned without anyone bothering to talk with me about it first feels ... sad.
Especially because I have such high regard for the guys who work for RSD. I have recommended their company to many men who I've met when I go out and have supported them on my blog. I had been told many negative things about RSD (the whole "cult" story etc.) but I have always defended them. At least they let people post URLs on their forum, unlike the other major player in the seduction community forum market. I felt encouraged when they started sending speakers to community events (Tyler at Complete Toolbox and Nathan at 21 Convention). I felt a new openness in the company.
(Later I learned that a friend of mine did try to call me to let me know before deactivating my account, but I didn't get a message ... and I still feel sad about not having the opportunity to talk with them first.)
My sadness was mixed in with other feelings. In some ways, being banned from RSD is a rite of passage. But ... still a feeling of "ouch" and something more ...
I realized my sadness goes deeper than just that feeling of not being treated like a person rather than an anonymous entity.
And it extends beyond RSD to the community at large. I feel sad about the idea of any of us treating each other as "competitors." I don't view myself as a competitor in any sense. I offer coaching based in Emotional Freedom Technique. It's not something they offer. I'm a complement to what is already offered, not a replacement. I'm also bringing people in to the community who are interested in EFT and some of the other things I write about, who otherwise would never have found the community.
Beyond that, though, there are so many ways in which we can all help each other instead of competing. With affiliate arrangements, for example, so-called "competitors" suddenly become friends.
There are ways to make this win/win, guys. I am still convinced that every one of us in the community has a slightly different target audience, and that the potential audience for these teachings is ENORMOUS. Far beyond what has yet been tapped. If I consider all the unhappy men and women in the world, and all the unhappy relationships that could be enlivened and healed with these teachings, what I see is a market that is many, many, many times larger than what we currently have.
You can be sure that I'll be doing some tapping on these issues over the weeks to come, to see what miracles I can manifest into my life. But in the meantime, I would welcome anyone in the community to talk openly about this phenomenon of closing our doors to each other ... because I don't think it helps anyone.